Proposition 8

Proposition 8 is a California problem, right? WRONG. It's just knocking at the door of every state in the country, especially if the issue fails to pass in California. If there is any question about the Church's official stand on Prop 8, read on for thoughts of an online friend of mine, Gina Woodhouse, a fellow missionary mom who lives in California. She gave me permission to cut and paste from her blog from Thursday, October 9, 2008.

Prop 8 Broadcast

Keith and I went up to the church last night to hear the broadcast from Salt Lake regarding Proposition 8. Elders Ballard, Clayton, Cook, and Bednar spoke and gave us more information about the impact this will have on society if it fails. They also reiterated the church's stance and stated that this is a moral issue and that the church has asked its members to be involved in every way possible-to give of our time and our means- to ensure that Prop 8 passes.

They quoted from "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" (text to follow) where it states that marriage is ordained of God and that it is part of our Heavenly Father's Plan of Happiness for His children to be able to experience mortality. There is no way that that could happen except through a mother and father.

Members of the church were asked to volunteer up to 4 hours a week to help with this cause. The brethren were asking for at least 30 people per ward and especially the young single adults and young marrieds to take an active role in moving this issue forward. These younger members of the church were specifically asked to use their skills and contacts with the internet (emails, websites, blogs, videos, YouTube, etc.) to get the information out to people everywhere.

Elder Bednar spoke to a group of BYU students and answered their questions. He said that tolerance doesn't mean to accept or condone something that is contrary to your beliefs. We are in a fight right now where it is tolerance (the world's view which means to accept) vs. free speech. One of the consequences of Prop 8 failing is that society would become an increasingly hostile environment for people who believe as we do. We will be expected to accept homosexual lifestyles and yet our own lifestyle of traditional marriage will be under fire and ridiculed when it conflicts with another's point of view.

Churches may lose their tax exempt status if they refuse to perform same sex marriages, church adoption agencies will be forced to close their doors (as the Catholic church did in Masssachusetts rather than place children in homosexual households), there could be sanctions against churches for teaching specific doctrine, and schools will teach children that all marriages are equal instead of allowing parents to teach their own beliefs and moral values to their children themselves.

Elder Bednar said that it is a ripple effect. The immediate effects will be seen right away but there will also be effects over time that would be like the outer ripples in the water. Those ripples will effect society for years to come.

We have almost finished Phase 1 which was the initial contacting of registered voters. Phase 2 is now underway which is to contact those undecided voters to share more information that could help them decide in favor of Prop 8. Phase 3 is already started too which involves signs, more calling, and encouraging people to register to vote.

There will be a big push right up until the day of the election to contact voters and get them motivated to get out to the polls. Members with college students living away from home and missionaries in the field were also encouraged to get absentee ballots for their children.

The Family: A Proclamation to the World

We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose.

In the premortal realm, spirit sons and daughters knew and worshipped God as their Eternal Father and accepted His plan by which His children could obtain a physical body and gain earthly experience to progress toward perfection and ultimately realize their divine destiny as heirs of eternal life. The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally.

The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.

We declare the means by which mortal life is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its importance in God’s eternal plan.

Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.

The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.

We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.

We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.

This proclamation was read by President Gordon B. Hinckley as part of his message at the General Relief Society Meeting held September 23, 1995, in Salt Lake City, Utah.

Posted by Gina woodhouse at 3:15 PM 0 comments Links to this post

A Lesson

Author Anna Quindlen said: “The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. . . . I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of my three children sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less”(Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11).

Wow--that just makes me want to bawl!! I heard that in a Relief Society lesson on Sunday (where I DID cry) and then saw it again on a friend's blog today. It sounds like something that could have been written by ME--except it wouldn't have sounded so good.

Random things

Well, I guess I've finally decided that my posts don't have to necessarily be soul-searching, deep-thinking, heart-wrenching posts. So this will be just a collection of random things.

Jessica is sick again. Last month it was strep throat. This month it's mono! When I was a kid nobody got mono unless they were one of those known "loose" girls. It's not called the "kissing disease" for nothing, you know! But my daughter assured the doctor that she has not been kissing anyone, and I believe her. She's only 13 and not into all that yet. So since mono is a virus, there's nothing we can do to treat it but wait it out and try to get her to go to bed earlier at night. Poor Jessica.

And what happened to my Tigers this year? Last Spring everyone was predicting that they would have the best team to play the game in many a year. They had all their big hitters back from last year, including the American League's Batting Champ, Magglio Ordonez, and the new guy they fought hard to get and promised the BIG bucks to, Miguel Cabrera. All the makings of a World Series championship team. And now here it is with only 2 or 3 games left in the season and they're what? How many games below .500??

A disappointing season for sure, but after all that--they're still all "my" Tigers!

Grandma Blain

Today marks the exact middle of September--the 15th. It's been dark, cool, and rainy now for 4 or 5 days. Shouldn't we still be having some nice sunny days? Technically, it's still summer! I'm getting tired of the gloom, though. It makes me feel down and lazy.

I was thinking about my Grandma Blain the other day. She used to keep 5-year diaries. You know, 5-year diaries only leave you maybe 5 lines to write on per day. I think maybe I could handle that. A couple years after she passed away, I borrowed her diaries from my Mom and read them. Oh, was she ever faithful when it came to writing in those diaries. Every evening she would sit in her chair and take up her diary and watch the 6:00 news. It wasn't because she wanted to record the "headline news" for that day. No, she needed to record the weather. The high and low temperatures for the day, to be exact, along with other pertinent information such as if it rained or the snowfall amount for the day. If she happened to be away from home, she would always fuss, "Oh, I hope Daddy remembered to check the weather for me." It's kind of funny when you think about it.

But there were always a few more lines to fill in after the high and low were recorded for the day, and in those lines I found wonderful things. Things that I didn't know about my Grandma and some things that I now treasure. I didn't know how much my grandma suffered. She had rheumatoid arthritis. She had major blood circulation problems and migraine headaches. And she was lonely.

She recorded when my Grandpa started planting peas and how high the corn was getting and when the tomatoes were starting to ripen. About cutting hay in a rush to get it in before it rained and which cow had a new calf. She had them all named.

And then there were also the entries like "Margie and Sherwin and the girls came for a visit today." "McBrides came for the day and got snowed in tonight." And then later on, "Nancy and John came for a visit." "We got a Valentine's Day card today from Nancy and John and the boys." "Nancy called today, and Jake sang a song over the phone." And many more.

She noted the birth of each of my children she was alive to see and once wrote "Margie called today. Jake is a genius." Referring to his IQ test scores when he started school.

I didn't realize at the time how lonely and isolated my Grandma felt living out on the farm, just her and Grandpa. And I didn't realize until reading those diaries how much those little visits, cards, and phone calls meant to her. And I'm so grateful for that. I don't remember much about those short visits or those calls made when I was a busy young mother. But it makes me happy to know that they meant so much to her and hopefully eased her loneliness a bit. I miss my Grandma and wonder sometimes what she would think or say about life in these times. I like to think about her looking down at all of us, watching over her family.

The Blain Reunion

It wasn't really advertised as a reunion. My cousins threw a 50th wedding anniversary open house for their parents on Saturday. Lyle Earl Blain II married Lois Palmbos on September 5, 1958. Uncle Lyle is my mother's younger brother. My older sister Kathy was their flower girl at the tender age of (almost) three.

Lyle and Lois have been blessed in this life with seven children, and their family story is a different one, indeed. Terri and Merri, twins, were the firstborns, followed by Lyle Earl Blain III. Then along came Renee and then Pam. Bringing up the tail were twins again, Debbie and Cindy. The unusual story behind it all is that here we are with six girls and only one boy, and ALL of the girls were born in June and the boy in October. The REALLY unusual part of the story is that the second set of twins, Debbie and Cindy, were born on the 10th birthday of the first set of twins, Terri and Merri. Now, what are the odds of that happening?

All seven of the kids were at the open house, and it was great to see them. A couple of them I hadn't seen in probably 25 years. The girls all live in Michigan, so there's really no excuse for that, and Lyle lives in Florida. As we were readying to leave the party on Saturday, there was talk of getting together again next summer, those of us who are able. I hope we do. It was a nice day.

Oh, and the answer to the big question is yes--cousin Lyle III does have a son whom he named Lyle Earl Blain IV, and I just found out on Saturday that he has also had a son, whom he named Lyle Earl Blain V. Unfortunately, the parents never married and don't see each other anymore, but apparently Lyle V does spend a good amount of time with his father.

Top picture, back row left to right--Terri, Lyle III, Merri, Lois and Lyle II, Pam
Front row left to right--Debbie, Renee, Cindy

Second picture (the cousins) back left to right--Terri, Pam, Merri, Lyle III, Me, Kathy, Lorie Front row left to right--Debbie, Renee, Cindy, and Margie

Third picture--Lyle Blain II, Marjorie Blain McBride, Lois Palmbos Blain

Fourth picture (the McBride Blains)--Lorie, Me, Mom and Grandy, Kathy, and Margie

Back to School!

Wow, here it is September already. The kids went back to school yesterday. Jessica was excited. Jordan was depressed. I can remember being so excited about the first day of school that I could barely sleep the night before. It never lasted much past the first couple days, but it was fun. Jordan is a junior this year, and Jessica is in 8th grade already!

Pictures!

I've finally found out how to post pictures. Yay! Heaven knows I've got plenty of them to share. Share with who, though? :)

A Review

I was just re-reading my other posts (all 4 of them), and I'd like to make a few comments. On my first post, aptly titled "A beginning..."--I'm not so sure that it would be so terribly embarrassing for someone else to read what I've written. It's not all that disturbing, after all. I've been reading some other people's blogs, and maybe I'm not so whacky after all.

"I Miss the Little Ones"--This one is kind of depressing when I think about it. But I think the reason it's depressing is that I am past the point of having my little children around and that I didn't write down my memories like so many other people I know are doing right now. What was I thinking? Did I really think I would be able to just remember all the witty and wonderful things that my 5 boys and my little girl said and did in their growing up years? (See? I'm welling up just thinking about it!) It's pretty sad.

It seems my entire life in the Church I've been at what I'll call an "odd age" compared to everyone else. When John and I were young marrieds there were very, very few if any other young marrieds in the ward. And at this point in our lives, we don't feel that kinship with any other couples, either. Is it that we're too picky? I don't know...

"San Diego"--Well, there's not too much else to say about that wonderful time. I could post some pictures, though.

And finally, when I was reading "Thoughts of August Last" I had sort of a revelation. I think that the reason I am still so sad about the death of my Dad can be found in the last paragraph. I don't think my Dad ever completely forgave me for going off to Washington, DC to be married in the temple. And he for sure never forgave John for taking me there. When the minister who performed his funeral was preparing his eulogy, he asked us to share memories of happy times with Dad. Everyone went around the room and told great stories of baseball games, weekend visits, and especially his famous steak dinners cooked on the grill. Only I sat there in silence. We, who lived here in the same town, were never once included in one of those weekend steak dinners, complete with homemade garlic toast and individual salads. How could that have happened? How could he have spent so much more time with and bonded so much closer to all of his grandchildren but the wonderful 6 that are mine? They missed so much. He missed so much.

So I guess my Dad went through the veil last August without ever forgiving his second daughter. I know I didn't do much during his life to try to help him realize how important the temple was to me. I was too intimidated by his sarcasm and his anger when it came to the Church. I can only hope and pray that after a year now he has begun to understand.

Thoughts of August Last

Boy, I've been dreading this. The month of August is nearly gone, and I've been able to put these voices out of my head for a couple weeks now. They tried to push their way into the front many times during that stretch in the middle of the month, but they always brought the threat of tears and sadness, so I pushed them back. I hope it wasn't disrespectful.

August 20th was the anniversary of the death of my Dad. Lots of dates in August now have more significance to me. August 14th was the day he went to the Emergency Room with what they thought was "just" another kidney stone. He ended up having emergency surgery for a ruptured aortic aneurysm. He "code blued" in recovery. The next day was, I believe, the last day that I saw him awake and was able to speak to him. He teased the nurses and was rude to Mom and talked about how they waited until the third daughter to name Marjorie and how she is the one who, in fact, is the Marjorie in the family. I was a little ticked off at how he was acting, but I'm pretty sure I gave him a kiss and told him I loved him before I left his room. On August 16th we passed his 72nd birthday at the hospital. They had put him in a drug-induced sleep, so Mom talked to him quietly about how they had had a date to go to Finley's for a free steak dinner that evening but that they could go another time. And on August 20th we made the decision to let him go.

I don't understand why with the knowledge that I have about life after this life and how I will make sure that he has the opportunities he needs, why thinking of his death still brings so much sadness. I know where he is and have some ideas about what he is doing and hopes for where he is going. But there is still the sadness. I know I will see him again. I told him as he was leaving us that his Mom, Dad, brothers, and many other loved ones were waiting for him on the other side. There would be a joyful reunion. But the sadness lingers.

I missed a lot of closeness and good times with my Dad over the past 30 or so years, things that my sisters and their families had that my family and I missed out on. I'm hoping that with his new-found knowledge that he realizes it, too. My Patriarchal Blessing says that I will be a savior unto my ancestors. I'll do what I can. The rest is up to them.

San Diego

It's August already, and summer is two-thirds gone. All my summer excitement occurred in the first third of the season, so it seems like it's been forever ago.

I got to spend 6 weeks with my dear son and his wonderful little family, and the time sped by so quickly that it almost seems now like it never happened. So many days filled with every-day life with Isabelle and Nikki and then little Emmeline. Waking early in the morning, breakfasts with Sponge Bob and Dora, reading an endless supply of kiddie books again and again. Pick out some clothes to wear, changing diapers, fixing bottles of milk, nap times and snack times. Pick up the toys again, play chase and rock on the horse, and take pictures, pictures, and more pictures. Kissing the baby, playing with chalk, and going to the pool. Costco and Ikea for hot dogs and waiting for Daddy to come home. Noodles and Patrick starfish, fixing hair, and watching Isabelle make popcorn all by herself. Tickles and giggles, lots of hugs, nighttime prayers, and after a while "I love you too, Gawmaw".

Memories of heaven, and what wouldn't I give to have them closer.